Random crap.

->It feels like I've been living in Zombie land for the past I dunno... few weeks. Everyday, I do nothing and life just passes me by. Too many thoughts. No thoughts at all. An overwhelming urge to write but nothing comes out at all. I feel like an impostor. So... empty. 

->I know that I'm privileged. I have got SO many opportunities and chances that millions of others haven't.

Why? Why me? 

-> Sometimes I'm scared I'm falling into apathy. We all know that that's no good. It would be ironic, really, considering the amount of contempt I have for people like that.

->I've recently read the Kite Runner. I'd watched the movie before, but the book is so disturbing man!!! It's one of the very few books that managed to disturb me this much. 

->I'm devoting this entire week to redecorating my room. I'm on the lookout for band posters and the like. Ideas anyone?

->>Stairway To Heaven is the most epic song, EVER.


->Why is it that my opinions change and perceptions shatter so easily? I mean, I thought Ayn Rand was awesome. I even downloaded all her books and started reading her books on philosophy and then... BAM! I read this and I'm almost like who's Ayn Rand? :/ Shouldn't I have more conviction in something that I believed in for years?

The same's the case with the Art Of Living. I'd attended their YES+ course for four days.. Later.. I saw some articles on the founder which alleged that he was a paedo and stuff and BAM! I started loathing the organization.. I couldn't get past this to look at the relief works that the AOL did.

When will I get over this? Will I ever?


->Why do we have crushes on people? Why? WHY??

Losing My Religion

This song means so much to me right now. I can't even express it properly. If you haven't listened to it, GO. Do it now.


Life is bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no I've said too much
I set it up

That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

Every whisper
Of every waking hour I'm
Choosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool
Oh no I've said too much
I set it up

Consider this
The hint of the century
Consider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failed
What if all these fantasies
Come flailing around
Now I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

But that was just a dream
That was just a dream

PASS!!

I PASSED IN ALL IN FIRST SEM!! 


with 72% though. 


BUT STILL I PASSED! 

And, when I told her this. My mom literally jumped with joy. She was expecting me to have 2-3 backlogs kehte. Yes, really. 

I should have known, my mom's always been like this. She SHOCKED my tenth grade teacher by asking her if I would pass in the boards, and if I ever was, I was a good student back then.  Make that a very good student. My teacher later came and asked me "What all do you do at home Sadhana? I was very surprised to hear her ask that!" I "er"ed at her, and she left it at that.

Anyhoo, ALL PASS AGAIN!

Let me go partayyy now.

(No, I'm really going to shop for some stuff that my cousins in the U.S. want. Quite boring really.)

P.S. Sorry, for all the updates, I have to cure my itch to get back on Facebook by posting here. I'm not ready.  Yet.

…maybe it’s the time of year. Yes, and maybe it’s the time of man. And I don’t know who I am. But life is for learning. Joni Mitchell (Woodstock) 1970

"Have you lost your mind? Are you dead or are you blind?" I frequently ask people this out of context. I have two exams tomorrow and instead of studying for them, I started singing quite seriously for about an hour. I went on and on in a fake British accent the entire time N.S. and I were supposed to be studying Physics, today afternoon. Yes, I am quite random. And er, weird.

I de-activated my facebook account. Yes, I WILL be back on it, but I need a break. Facebook detox.
I've been saying that I did because "I felt like it", but quite frankly the reason is that I'm sick of stalking. No, no, I don't go about stalking random people and send fraandshipz requests to them. My stalking makes sense, I assure you. Albeit in a stalker-y kind of way. I'm also sick of seeing or feeling that other people's lives are better than mine. And wishing that I had something that someone has, or could do something that someone did. Facebook is the main source from which I get such information, so I decided I'm better off without it for now.

I've been listening to classic rock non-stop and generally feel like a hippie.  Not that I take hallucinogenic drugs OR wear bell bottom pants, but just in that you know, I've been thinking of stuff quite a bit (Peace and The "society" and all that) and it's the music too. It takes me somewhere else.... Music IS my drug. Really.

I know I sound like a bunch of other people from my generation who listen to this awesome music too, but I really, REALLY wish I were at Woodstock. I wish I could see all those grooveh bands live. The music that's coming out these days.... "Baby" and horror of horrors "Friday(Rebecca Black one)"

*Shudders*

I want a gramophone. And vinyl record albums. : )

Day 18

Plans/Dreams/Goals you have. 

Plans: I want to graduate from engineering. Then, I'm thinking of taking up an M.A. in mass comm or journalism.

Dreams: I want to "live it up" in a metropolitan city on my own, working as a writer of some sort. I want to travel. I want to see the "real" India, I want to go to places and stay there long enough so that it's not just the touristy things I get to see. I want to see the world, I want to save the world. And I want to be happy. 

Also, I want to get through IAS ( Top ten), train to become an IFS, not forest, foreign service, and then become an ambassador to some country (?)

I guess I am a dreamer.

Goals: Um. See above. 



Day 17

Someone you would want to switch lives with for one day and why? 

I would like to switch lives for a day with.... anyone who's studying Mass Comm or Psychology or Eng. Lit or something like that. Because then, for at least ONE day, I'll study and enjoy studying, and LIVE.

Day 16

Your current relationship status. If single, discuss how single life is. 

Single. Single life is....... the only life I've known. It's good only ya! : P

I can't imagine my self being in a "relationship" as such. I'm too cyborg like for something like that. Or maybe not, but I can't know. (for the time being at least.) Relationships can be SUCH bitches, so I'm not very keen on being in one either.
 

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